A handful of us back in the rear were sent to Combat LifeSaver class. Which I've already been certified in. Apparently something's different now and we have to redo it. Maybe my enrollment in the alcohol program thing will be a good enough excuse to get me out of it. My life is wildly interesting right now. I sound like an old retired man who is conversing with someone (more to himself actually) about how he should trim the hedges. Such a great concern.
When you have little to nothing to do, your sense of perspective is skewed quite a bit. I'm getting lazy. Last week I actually got around to cleaning my room to the point where it actually looked good. I've already screwed it up again. And now I'm struggling for something worth writing about, to prove to anyone reading that I'm still breathing.
Its amazing how long these four day weekends last when you aren't annihilated. I'm still not doing anything productive, but also not doing anything destructive either. I'm in limbo.
Sitting in the class today, struggling to stay awake. The classroom atmosphere lulls your once alert senses into near slumber, and you begin to see two booklets instead of one. Your fifty ton eyelids drag themselves down over the irises that are crossing and rolling into your head. Nonsense gibberish in fuzzy image and distant sound quality replace your surroundings, and the subconscious babble sneaks its way into what little you still perceive from the classroom.
I force my eyes open and shift in my chair and attempt to hide a yawn. How the hell am I going to do college? The guy behind me sips from a Red Bull. I vow to smoke a fat bag of crack next time.
Despite a headache and tonsils that are becoming sore again (I hope they get bad so I can have the damn things ripped out), a friend and I ventured into the less often visited civilian world. To a mall. A poor excuse for a social gathering where people are terrified of eye contact. The new age bazaar selling nothing under the pretense of Something For Everyone. Kids with tight pants, eye makeup, and long shaggy hair in their faces. And pink boxer shorts hanging out of their jeans. A feeble and not entirely conscious attempt at counter-culture. Who needs moments of introspection when you've got all this free People-Watching right in front of you?
Maybe I need goals. I could always buy a car. And then what? I'd have the sincere and grown-up position of being a responsible bill-payer (paying for cable over the phone just doesn't do it for me). But wait, this is the army. You just set up an allotment, and your car payment is taken out of your paycheck before you even see any of the money, so you don't miss a payment. I'd have a vehicle to pay for, and nowhere to drive it. I think this upcoming rant warrants its own post...